||[Nov. 18th, 2008|11:59 pm]
crayzEe Lips 629
This is from March 13, 2005:|
I was lying around one afterschool afternoon and I just thought of some of the things that had happened within the last few years and how quickly Im losing grip of them. Of course, I wouldnt know most of everyone if it wasn't for one damn dancing video game. That machine is really a blessing. And it makes me smile thinking of the pier, hanging with johnny, joey, gordon, jer, reese, will, the whole ddr gang and even the ones we thought were annoying. dont deny it- there was animosity there. but even so, we all had fun. i like reminiscing about the metreon. about cyberstation. and especially the random moments that easily changed a normal day into something unique. it can even be the first few days of learning how to skate. all those 4th of july's we spent watching the fireworks. playing basketball at north beach. or just spending our last few bucks watching movies at amc. do you remember when we 1-2-3 ditched that chinatown restaurant? oh the rush. remember claudia's bday/bonfire? that was fun. brings warmth to my heart. and here i am sitting here, with the most unbelievable feeling just thinking of the past. i guess what triggered this whole past-sickness (invented a word) is when johnny sent me a wave file with me will johnny and jeff singing the "We put the Spring in Springfield" song. since then i cant stop thinking of those days. it can be both a good thing and a bad thing. they say never forget the past but dont live in it. its funny because back then id reminisce of the past, and now im reminiscing of those days reminiscing. its an endless loop i tell ya. I dont know. there always has to be sappiness in my life dammit. if you tend to be rock hard and think the sappy things in life are worthless then i feel sorry for you. cuz its the heartwarming feelings in life, knowing you can be happy with such a simple reminiscence, looking back and seeing how things have changed or stayed the same in your life, remembering familiar faces who may have deviated from you, and knowing where you come from and how you arrived at where you are now- those are the most priceless treasures you'll have.
because life will one day go back to normal once again and you'd have let that chance slip by. i guess i try so hard to keep things as i remember them that i forget everyone has their own lives now. and there's nothing to do but accept it. its just really hard to see people drift away from you. really hard to know you cant live another day of the past. its just really hard.
we're all dreamers. dont be afraid to know that.